Two years ago I posted a open casting call on my instagram and told anyone who was interested could be apart of it, and called it "Kids" Inspired by the infamous Larry Clark Film. That Summer I received a email from Larry Clarks team telling me he was a fan of my interpertation of his movie. That went on to be one of my most noteable shoots of all of my issues. I wanted to do a similar shoot for this issue, however I wanted to show case a group of kids that felt closer to home.
Although I was a City Kid, I never really fit in with any one at school. I was funny, but never had any friends. It wasn't until I started listening to more alternative music in middle school, that I finally felt like I connected with a group of people. Those were the Scene Kids. Goths. Emo's. Punk's. Metal Head's. Grungey Teens, and ripped jeans were the only way I knew how to interperate the horrifying feelings of coming to terms with my own sexuality, in a society that was seemingly built to oppress me. It truly wasnt a phase, mom. Even to this day if someone were to play a Pierce the Veil, my heart would race.
In 2014 me and my friend's went to my towns street fair wearing face eyeliner and our darkest clothes. I was a skull, my friend Serena was a cat, and my other friend Victor was a Pumpkin. We walked around the fair having the time of our lives, and although I was having such a fun time, I couldnt help but notice how many people stared at me. How many followed us through the fair, how many whispered when we walked past. This was something I started thinking of recently, after I started handling my mental health differently, for I felt that feeling of people staring at me. Of the whispers behind my back. It got me thinking why it was so distracting to others when someone expresses themselves? I used to be so scared to express that weird side of me that just loved to play dress up, or be scary and creepy because I was so ashamed of all of the stares. I never wanted to tell people if I was feeling hurt because I was honestly scared of what they would say behind my back. People see vunerablity, and it throws them off.
I re-made this shoot in honor of me and my friend group at the time. In honor of all of the eyeliners stolen from rite aid. For all of the wristbands that hid brusies and scars. For all of the queer kids that saw representation in the Alternative world, and for the fallen ones that didnt get a chance to see it. I wanted to show to beauty of the Scene Kid. The kid that doesn't listen to pop, but instead listens to archived Nirvana sets. To the kid that paints their nails black with sharpie, and burns their hair with a flat iron or bleach. To all of the boys in makeup, and to all of the girls in buzzcuts. We found beauty in an enraging world, and from that we are stronger. All of the people in this shoot, weather its their first time in all black or their 5th day wearing the same band T-Shirt, are the true embodyment of what it means to CRACK. To break away from any limits, and to shake up the world.
Lastly, to all of the young people out there that used their ipods to drown out their pain...you are strong and think of how far you've come, and how far we can go.